How to build inner strength and trust
In a world full of change, uncertainty and challenges, it is more important than ever to create a place of security within ourselves. This inner anchor, a deep trust in ourselves, helps us to remain calm and composed even in difficult times. Regardless of whether we are currently in a toxic relationship that we want to break free from, want to change employers, finally emigrate or want to start our own business. The challenge always remains the same, especially when things are not as easy or quick as we would like or unexpected problems such as health problems arise as symptoms of constant insecurity.
The question is therefore: how do I build up this feeling of “security within me”?
In this article, you will learn why inner security is so important and how you can develop more stability and trust in yourself with targeted exercises. A long-term solution requires additional trauma work and the sustainable transformation of injured inner parts, if necessary with the help of experienced companions.
1. Why is inner security so important?
When you feel secure in yourself, you face life's challenges and uncertainties from a position of strength. This feeling enables you to:
• Make more confident decisions
• Better manage stress and anxiety
• Build deeper and more honest relationships
• Be more resilient to setbacks
Inner security does not mean that you no longer have fears or insecurities - it is more about knowing that you can count on yourself, even in stormy times.
2. Reflection: What does security mean to you?
Everyone has a different idea of what "security" means. For some it is a feeling of control, for others the certainty that they are accepted and loved. Here is an exercise to gain more clarity:
Exercise:
Take some time and calmly answer the following questions:
• When do I feel safest? What are typical situations for this?
• Which people or places give me a feeling of security?
• What does “inner security” mean to me personally?
• What thoughts or beliefs might be standing in my way?
This reflection will help you to better understand your individual security needs and to work on them more specifically. As soon as you are aware of them, you can change something about them.
3. Connection to the body: How does bodywork help with inner security?
Inner security is closely connected to our body feeling. Often it is physical signals such as a palpitation or muscle tension that indicate inner insecurity. By consciously perceiving and working with our body, we can create more stability and reduce stress.
Exercise:
Try to do a “body scan” meditation regularly:
1. Sit or lie down in a relaxed manner and close your eyes.
2. Mentally go through every part of your body and observe how it feels - from your feet to your head.
3. If you feel tension or discomfort, consciously breathe into these areas and try to relax them.
This practice not only sharpens your body awareness, but also signals to your nervous system that you are confident in yourself.
4. Develop self-compassion - be your best friend
One of the biggest steps on the path to inner security is learning how to deal with ourselves. Self-compassion means being kind and supportive to yourself in difficult moments. It's not about others.
Exercise:
If you are in a stressful situation or criticizing yourself for something, imagine that you are talking to a close friend. What would you say to that person?
Write down the following words and remind yourself of them whenever you feel insecure or hard on yourself: "I am here for myself. I am enough. I am doing my best."
5. Build inner strength through daily rituals
Rituals and routines give us structure and orientation and can be a valuable source of inner stability. Especially in stressful or challenging times, small, regular rituals help us to create a safe framework and focus on ourselves.
Ideas for daily rituals:
• Morning ritual: Begin each morning with a short meditation or a gratitude journal to start the day consciously and positively.
• Evening ritual: Use the evening to reflect on the day. Write down three positive experiences or insights that have given you security.
• Breathing exercises: Take a few minutes every day to breathe consciously and deeply. This calms your nervous system and strengthens your feeling of inner security.
For me, it is currently that when I get up in the morning I drink a large glass of water, draw a tarot card for the energy of the day and then become aware of what is important to me today. If I feel the need to ground myself during the day, I play the handpan. I don't have an evening ritual at the moment, but I kept a gratitude diary for a while that accompanied me throughout the day.
Through such rituals you anchor more security in everyday life and create a stable anchor within yourself.
6. Set boundaries and build self-confidence
We often feel insecure when we feel overwhelmed by external expectations or negative influences. Setting boundaries is an essential step to remain internally secure and true to yourself. Especially if you come from an entangled environment or are still in a toxic relationship.
Exercise:
Write down in which areas of your life you want to protect your boundaries more strongly. Ask yourself:
• When do I say "yes" even though I actually want to say "no"?
• Which people or situations drain my energy?
• Where would a clear "no" strengthen my well-being and security?
Setting boundaries is an act of self-protection and signals to yourself that you really take yourself and your needs seriously. Because we often give up on ourselves first instead of keeping to our boundaries and putting ourselves first.
7. Train mindfulness and self-awareness
An important aspect of inner security is the ability to stay present and with yourself in challenging moments. Through mindfulness exercises, you train to observe your thoughts and emotions without letting them overwhelm you.
Exercise:
Start with a simple mindfulness exercise:
1. Sit down quietly and breathe in and out deeply.
2. Pay attention to your thoughts and feelings without judging them or trying to change them.
3. When insecurity or fear arise, say to yourself: "I see you, dear insecurity, and let you go in love."
With this exercise, you will learn to consciously perceive difficult emotions and still remain in your inner stability. These are inner parts that need your attention right now - take them seriously instead of repressing them.
Conclusion
Inner security is a process that takes time, patience and practice. It develops through the interplay of self-awareness, compassion, conscious body work and clear boundaries. It is about creating a stable basis within ourselves that we can fall back on at any time, regardless of what is happening around us.
The workbook "security in me" (currently in German only) offers you many other practical exercises and reflections that will support you on this path. It will probably also be available in bookstores as a printed softcover workbook in DIN A4 format from December. You can get it now as part of the Secret Masterclass, which will take place on November 22nd. will open with a free constellation work on the topic and then from November 25th to 29th will help you to put all these insights into practice immediately in daily ZOOM calls with many practical exercises and live coaching sessions.
Through the practices shared in this article, you will strengthen your resilience, develop deep self-confidence and find an inner peace that will give you support even in challenging times.
Create your own inner refuge now and be the safest anchor in your life!
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